It's getting to be that time of year when holiday trees will soon Santa
honor. It's now less than two months of winter vacation, and you know what
that means: shopping! If you're scratching your head, find what prezzies
for radical leftists for Christmas or whatever they're in, I have great
suggestions.
Gifts for feminists
Feminists are never happy, and much of their eternal grouchiness results of
deep sexual frustration. Naturally, it's hard to get a lot of action when
their hair is buzzed short and dyed neon colors, their faces are all
pierced up, their skin is covered with bad tattoos, and they're addicted to
Ben & amp; Jerry s. Worse than all of the above combined their miserable
attitudes.
They need a good sex toy to stimulate joy. For a typical garden variety
that still believes that feminism is about equality (which hasn t true
since the mid-1950s), a vibrator six inches thin enough. For a simple vegan
granola-munching with feminism in its ideological grab bag go organic with
a cucumber. For a woman's studies professor, however, you'll have to do a
little splurge. She will need a blaster clit extra-strength operating on
three-phase 480V. When Ms. Feminist toes were curled enough, then she'll be
able to drop the & # 8216; and start joining the ranks study of normal
humanity.
Gifts for black radicals
BLM was given carte blanche to destroy cities and the police attack, as
they did in this scene in Baltimore
Got some buddies in BLM? Sure, they love to get away from American cops who
believe they are the gunning down for no reason. In addition, it is always
a good thing to get in touch with a s ancient culture, right? I have the
perfect solution.
Give them a trip to Africa. Since they're suffering from white oppression,
send them to a black country of their choice: Liberia, Uganda, Rwanda,
Zimbabwe, whatever suits their fancy. Problem solved! In this tropical
paradise, the weather is lousy as ever Harlem, Chicago, Baltimore and
Detroit. Since they'll be happy to stay in these beacons of human rights
within their own people, to make it a one-way ticket.
Gifts for Antifa
This domestic terrorist outfit is well known for the use of improvised
weapons: household chemicals, bottles filled with cement, fireworks, even
used tampons. Well, all that's a bit of second order for armaments, do not
you think?
It time for them to start using real weapons manufactured. The series of
animated Road Runner drawing presented a wide variety of fine, the
weapons-grade material: rockets, explosives, you name it. You only need to
send your friends Antifa catalog Acme Corporation; their friend Dr. Evil
identify the dough to buy all the top quality products.
Gifts for Hispanic radicals
Unlike their citizenship oaths (for those who arrive legally worth),
radical Hispanics want to resume the US southwest and separate. After that,
they will turn Aztlan in a place like they are gone, of course. There are
some problems here. First, there are too liberal in California who can t
get rid of because they're paying all taxes for welfare lavish benefits
they enjoy. Second, secession didn t work too well in the Southeast States
some time, so why are they'll do better in the Southwest? The completion of
a second Pickett s leaf blowers armed load is too risky. Fortunately, I
have a better idea.
What they really need are better Latin American countries; then invading
and dismembering another nation would be useless. At present, governments
south of the border are usually run by corrupt plutocrats who nt public did
not care These gift kleptocracies t provide social services (not an
uncommon problem in the Western world as well.) they don t have a tax base
of the middle class to strip for me the redistribution of income as here.
Their plutocrats rely on immigration to the United States as the economic
security valve that keeps the poor masses to overthrow. For decades, our
plutocrats were okie dokie with this arrangement; Democrats want more block
of voters, and Republicans want the cheap labor.
Send us your economic writings Latin American radicals G. K. Chesterton
friends and Hilaire Belloc, preferably in Spanish. Distributism will create
local healthy economies based in their home countries, ultimately allowing
them to obtain the crooks on their backs. In addition, they'll need a
reading material for a single bus journey direction back to where they
belong.
Gifts for billionaire globalist
Now that we're wrapping things up with the Milky Way, the time we planned
our leveraged buyout in the Andromeda galaxy.
These guys are so bored they fill their empty lives with extremely strange
activities and destabilizing countries funsies. What can you do for someone
who is richer than God? I have just the answer.
The classic motivational Who Moved My Cheese? will be a great success. Some
of them sent it to their employees as a small parting gift during a reorg &
# 8221;, downsizing & # 8221;, rightsizing & # 8221;, offshoring & # 8221;,
or whatever they want to call canning thousands of people who actually did
the work. Some plebeians regarded this sort of thing rather insulting & #
8212; as Dilbert creator Scott Adams put, a patronizing message for the
proletariat to acquiesce & # 8212; but some of the blows of paradise t
likely to read themselves.
This could help to adjust their attitude after re thrown off the gravy
train. That's most likely if the US is Distributism hip as well as the
closure of their special tax loopholes. For those who have been
particularly ambitious screwing the public for personal gain, also include
Who Moved My Soap? The CEO's Guide to survive prison.
Social Justice Warriors Gifts
SJWs are the lowest of the low on the totem pole radical. They have no real
life are often batshit crazy, and welch want on their massive loans for
gender studies PhD Their approach to activism involves posting memes on
Tumblr and shout Check your privilege & # 8221;, believing somehow this
improves the world. I stocking stuffer for them.
The gene pool needs a stiff dose of chlorine about now, and these useless
eaters & # 8221; are (undeserved) living proof. Help them to permanently
reduce their carbon footprint to zero by giving them a copy of the suicide
practical book Final Exit.
Read more: 7 Products recommended for your liberal friends butthurt
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